The Christian EducatorA publication of North Valley Baptist Schools

Teacher, My Mommy Won't Help Me!

By Kristin Castillo

Training parents to teach their children at home

During the first semester of school, I was working with one of my students in a lower level reading group. She had a difficulty understanding the basics and for a couple months she continued to struggle as the material progressed. Her test scores were low, especially in phonics and comprehension. I incorporated several methods to help her, still she didn’t seem to progress. After her first couple test scores were released, I addressed the subject with her parents. They agreed to would work harder with. Within weeks of our communication, I saw little effort and her test scores remained unchanged. After questioning her, she let me know that she had the desire to practice, but that “no one will help me.”  I asked her, “Did you tell your mommy or daddy that you had reading homework?” She replied that she had, but that the parents didn’t have sufficient time to help multiple children in the home.

This situation is reminiscent of many struggling students and their frustrated teachers.  I am sure you can relate with the many times you have been forced to cope with parents who do not work with their children at home. I have only taught four years and this is a problem I still face with each new class of students. In American homes, parents today spend 40% less time with their children than did parents a generation ago.[i] No wonder students complaining about parents’ lack of attention to studies. What is a teacher to do when he has a student like this? The truth is, after an educator has done his best to teach the student, there comes a time when the teacher must train the parent to teach the child.

Communicate consistently. Consistent communication is the first step in training a parent to take responsibility for his child’s academics. A parent’s career can become the prime inhibitor of taking time for a child. 64% of married couples with children are dual-earners.[ii] As such, the majority of working parents will only catch a glimpse of a school’s exterior, as they are either dropping off or picking up their child. Making an entrance if absolutely necessary, most parents will rarely step foot inside the classroom. Teacher-parent contact is necessary. A well-informed parent will be more likely to help his child if he knows what is expected.

Be informative and provide a weekly update letter. List a calendar of events including student birthdays, special celebrations, and school events. Schedule weekly due dates for assignments. Give a brief description of material that will be covered in class for tests and quizzes. You may also find it helpful to mention classroom needs in this letter. Suggest teaching tips for home and explain how to develop good study habits. Call about helpful resources such as literature, websites, or review games that can be used at home.

Be prompt when replying to missed calls or emails. Giving a quick response shows the parents you care about their concerns and their child’s needs. Depending on the subject matter, do not wait longer than a day to reply. If the teacher is simply answering a question, make contact on that same day. If the situation is more detailed and serious, send a quick response informing the parent that you will need a few days to take time to ponder your answer. Pray and get advice from a veteran teacher if needed.

Be finitely available. Inform parents you are accessible, but set a boundary for times of contact. Teachers should be accessible and show they are ready to help; however, do not allow parents to take up the majority of you work day. Use the weekly letter or class syllabus to list what times you can be reached and by which avenue of communication you are accessible.

Establish delegation. A teacher will always have classroom needs. Whether these needs be supplies or equipment, an extra set of hands, or a reducing of paper work, help is welcomed. With the permission of school administration, allow select parents to volunteer in the classroom. These volunteers will not only lighten your load, but it will also give the parent some valuable classroom time.

Establish social events and extra-curricular activities. Hold class parties, field trips, celebrations, or special days, and welcome all parents. The more often a parent spends with the class, the more tuned in he will be to classroom habits and material. Hosting such events will cause parents to show support for their child and become more aware of what is being taught. Every now and then, assign a project that will require the parent to the help the student outside of class. In-class-assignments such a show-n-tell, cooking day, or craft days are also good ways to bring parents into the class. Parental involvement is an essential role. As much as a teacher would like, it is impossible to enforce quality learning time at home. Instead, inform parents of statistics: more than 75% of American children are at risk because of paternal deprivation. Even in two-parent households, fewer than 25% of young boys and girls experience an average of at least one hour a day of relatively individualized contact.[iii] Compel parents to be proactive in their child’s education by encouraging the parents to participate in the classroom as well as at home.

These techniques became useful in dealing with the student and parents I mentioned earlier.  She is finally able to master the subjects with which she once struggled, and I feel great satisfaction knowing that both the student and parents were trained.

[i] John P. Robinson, How Americans Use Time: A Social-Psychological Analysis of Everyday Behavior (New York; Praeger, 1977)
[ii] U.S. Census, 2002
[iii] Henry B. Biller, Trends in Fathering (www.fathers.com, 1994)

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